4 Weeks Left!

So it's pretty crazy but I only have 4 weeks left until my due date! I know that everyone keeps telling me that it's not uncommon to go past your due date with your first baby but I do not want to think about that. I have October 24th engraved in my brain so if I go past that date, I'm pretty sure I'll go crazy. Overall, it's felt like this pregnancy has gone by pretty fast but now that I'm getting closer and closer, it's starting to go a little slower. But I am kind of getting to the freak out stage of pregnancy. I don't know if we have everything we need and it's just weird to think that a baby, that I'm 100% responsible for, is going to be here soon! I will never not be a mom again. It's so weird to think about. 

30 Weeks

32 Weeks

I had a baby shower last Saturday that my visiting teachers put on for me. It was women from the ward and neighborhood so it was so fun and there were so many people that were so generous! It was such a busy Saturday for our ward and there were so many women that couldn't make it but they made the effort and dropped off a gift before the shower even started. It was so nice of everyone and I had a great time. Unfortunately I didn't get any pictures but I got some great stuff. Cute clothes, a quilt, our baby monitors, books, etc. It was so fun. I have my family shower this Saturday and I can't wait! It's going to be my family and Zach's side of the family so it's going to be a party! Even my sister Angie is flying in from Colorado with her little girl to come to it. I can't wait. 

Besides all the shower fun, I've been having a little bit of a rough time. Last week I hurt my back, somehow. I had a bad back even before I got pregnant so I think with the weight gain, the baby pulling all my weight to the front, and all my joints loosening it's taking a toll on my back. So I did something to it, I don't know what, but every time I try and put weight on my left leg my back kind of pops and gives out on me. I went to the doctor on Monday and he prescribed a muscle relaxer to try and get it to calm down and he said if those don't help, then it could be something else that we can't really take care of until the baby gets here because I'm so far along. AKA Deal with it until you deliver. So I've taken a couple days off from work to try and get it to calm down and I've taken the pills but they don't even touch it so I stopped. It makes me think that it's not muscular, it's a joint or a nerve problem. I've come to the conclusion that it's probably something I have to deal with until I get her here. Now I'm in the dilemma of what to do about work. I don't want to take the next 4 weeks off because my back hurts, but I don't know how productive I'll be at work if I can't demonstrate the exercises or walk very well. I've been walking around with a cane and I talked to my boss yesterday about what he thinks I should do and seeing if there's any clerical work I could do that wouldn't involve my back much. We're trying to come up a decision that works for everyone so I just pray that I'll be able to get back to work somehow... Until then, hopefully my back will get better, or I'll be able to tolerate it. Better yet, let's just have her come 2 weeks early and then I won't have to worry about it anymore! I know, probably unlikely but a girl can dream. 

Pregnancy-24 Weeks

So this is going to be a boring post with no pictures but I just want to write down my thoughts. I'll have to post pictures on some other post in the future. Sorry. I am now 24 weeks pregnant which is crazy to me. I have about 3 1/2 months left and I just feel like it's coming up so fast! I'm nervous that we're not going to be ready for this little one when she's ready to come! But we're working on it. Here are some of my thoughts about pregnancy so far.

-We have 2 names in mind- Kelikei (my name in Hawaiian) or Kalia (beauty in Hawaiian). Right now, I think I'm leaning more towards Kalia. I like them both so we'll see.  

- I LOVE feeling her move inside me. It makes her feel more real especially when I start to figure out the tricks that get her to move. She moves like crazy when I eat fruits and the other day she moved every time Reina, Nicole's dog, barked. It's cool that her ears are developed enough to hear things now.

- I worry that she's already developing an attitude. Any time I hunch over and sit with my hands on my knees, she moves around and kicks me like she's getting mad at me for invading her space. As soon as I spread back out, she stops. It's pretty funny

- I haven't had any weird cravings yet but I can't eat chicken breast. It just grosses me out. If it's cut up, shredded, or cooked in to something then I'm okay. If someone just puts a straight up chicken breast in front of me, I can't handle eating it. I don't know if it's the texture or what but ugh...

- I'm still not great at eating my veggies because they don't sound appealing to me either but fruits always sound good.

- My belly is getting bigger and bigger every week. The maternity clothes that used to be really loose are now being stretched slowly.

- My muscles under my stomach hurt SO bad when I've been on my feet all day and It's not as easy to get out of bed in the morning. I feel like an old lady when I put my shoes and socks on because I can't just reach down and throw them on anymore. I have to get creative with it.

- My older sister, Angie, was right. Every other pregnant woman is cuter than me. And trust me, there are A LOT. Zach still is so sweet by telling me how beautiful or hot I look every day, but it's getting harder and harder to believe it. I'm not trying to throw myself a pity party but I don't really appreciate what's happening to my butt, hips, and thighs right now. I just have to keep telling myself to keep myself and the baby healthy and then I can worry and work on other stuff once she's here. It's not easy but I'm trying.

-These pregnancy dreams are killing me! Some of the classics: 1) I wasn't prepared for soccer tryouts for the high school and was just BS-ing my way through it and didn't know any of the girls then the parents showed up for a meeting and I wasn't ready for that either. I felt like an idiot. 2)I hadn't seen my baby for the first year of her life and my mom was raising her so when I finally met her, she didn't know me and cried the whole time I was there. 3) We were blessing her, her dress was green, she was like 1 1/2 years old, and right before we blessed her I realized that it wasn't my baby. I started crying and asking everyone where my baby was and my whole family was telling me to stop freaking out and just bless that baby like it's my own.

-I'm already getting sick of a lot of the comments I've been getting and I'm not even that big yet! Some people have been really great, nice, considerate, exciting, etc. but it always seems like the women have some of the rudest comments. I don't know if they are trying to force their "wisdom" on me but seriously... And yes, I may be sensitive sometimes but you'd think that they would understand! Some of the ones I've received that have really gotten to me:
        "Oop you don't have a waist anymore!"
        "Wow looks like you need a bigger shirt!"
        "How are you feeling? Are you still exhausted?" me- "A little ya, but I'm doing better." Her, "Well  you're gonna be tired for the next 18 years so you better get used to that feeling!" (Seriously?! Why do you have to point that out instead of getting me excited?)
        "You know things are never gonna be the same with yours and Zach's relationship after this." (Ok, did you ever think that we're okay with the way our relationship is going to change?)

I have received some really great comments, don't get me wrong. But the saying is true. You need like 5 good comments to drown out 1 bad one. Maybe it's my negative thinking or something, who knows.

Sorry for the rambling session. I just wanted to document my thoughts. For the most part, being pregnant is fun. It's fun to see me grow because that means my baby is growing and the doctor says that her and I are doing great. She has a strong heartbeat and we found out in the ultrasound that everything looks perfect. I can't wait to see and meet this little girl. I am dying to see what she looks like and to see her personality. It's going to be so crazy but so fun!

Our Family

 So I've spent all this time playing catch up so I think now it's time to write about our soon-to-be addition to our family. Everyone knows this by now but I am pregnant! We are so excited and can't wait for this little bugger to get here already. I know we still have awhile so we'll definitely have to learn some patience. But here's the story. Zach has wanted a baby for FOREVER! If it were up to him, I would've been pregnant a month after we got married. Luckily, I talked him in to us waiting at least a year so I got closer to finishing school and all that jazz. So he let me wait a year, almost exactly. In November, I was off the pill. We were thinking, okay it's not that difficult, you stop taking the pill, you get pregnant. So we were a little disappointed each month when I started my period. I know we hadn't even been trying for that long and people will probably think I'm ridiculous for getting nervous so early but I couldn't help it. So in February, we didn't really get our hopes up because we hadn't been counting days or anything like that. I did the 14 days of Valentine's for Zach again this year but since Valentine's day is on a Tuesday, he had to go to work. We had dinner on the Saturday before but he wanted to spend at least the next day with me so he took it off. I thought that was really random because it was a Wednesday so it wasn't like we were going to go do anything fun anyway but it must have been meant to be. I hadn't started my period yet and I was supposed to start on Sunday. Again, people will probably think that I'm crazy but I was NEVER late. It was always right on, give or take a day. So I was driving myself crazy. I sneaked in to the bathroom and took a test, without Zach realizing it. I didn't want to just sit in there staring at the test so I went to the kitchen and made a sandwich. I almost forgot about it but then I went back and couldn't believe it when I saw that little + sign. I probably stared at it for a minute.

So I walked out with it and I must have had this goofy smile or something on my face because Zach looked at me and was like, "What?" So I just held up the test and he's like, "negative?" and I just shook my head. I seriously didn't know what to say. He didn't believe me at first and just kept saying nuh-uh. He came and looked at it and it was kind of a faded + sign so he made me take another one. This time, it was a lot darker so we knew for sure that it was positive. We sat there in shock for a minute and then just hugged each other and cried a little.

So since that day, we have told all of our family, obviously. I have made it through the first trimester, I'm now 18 weeks along and we had our first ultrasound today that told us it's a GIRL! Zach really wanted a boy so I asked him if he was disappointed and he said of course not. He really wanted a boy but now that he knows it's a girl, he really wants a girl. Plus, this little girl will have him wrapped around her finger in no time. So today was really exciting. Not only did we find out it's a girl, but we got to see our baby for the first time. It was so cool to see the heart, the spine, brain, head, etc. and just see that everything is okay. I feel like I'm bigger than I'm supposed to be but the doctor hasn't said anything and the ultrasound tech said that she didn't think so, so maybe I'm just carrying it differently.

 

 

Now that we know it's a girl, it just makes it feel more real to me. Zach has already gone and bought onesies and I'm going to get fabric for her blanket tomorrow. We are just so excited to have this little addition to our family. It's a little intimidating to think that I'm going to be a mom soon but hopefully I figure it out as I go. I just have to have faith that Heavenly Father knows what he's doing because this is His special spirit and he knows me better than I know myself. So if He trusts me, with all of my flaws and faults, to raise this precious spirit, then I better have trust in Him to help me and have faith in myself. I love this little girl already and she's not even here yet. I  know it's going to be a learning experience with some hard times and some great times and I'm obviously going to make a lot of mistakes along the way, but I am so grateful for this opportunity to become a mom and this great blessing that is going to come in to our lives in October.

Spring Break

Yes I know that Spring Break was FOREVER ago but let's face it, I am awful at this blogging thing. So I'm choosing to talk about it now. Spring Break for the Miller's was really fun. I don't even know what brought it up but we were talking about how we should go somewhere. We didn't have money to burn or anything like that but we at least wanted to get out of South Jordan. I was talking to my sister Angie one day and she said, "hey you guys should drive out here and spend a weekend with us!" I brought it up with Zach  and he got really excited about it and said it would be a lot of fun. The plan was set in motion and we drove out to Colorado for our Spring Break.

It was so much fun being out there with them! The drive wasn't that bad and we just stayed at their house so we didn't have to pay for a hotel. We didn't do anything outrageous. We went to the outlets, TJ Maxx ( I finally got my sunglasses and a cute scarf thanks to Angie) and went out to dinner for Angie's birthday. We went to the Butterfly Exhibit (or whatever it's called), a St. Patrick's Day parade, and to yummy Smashburger and an ice cream place. Otherwise our time was spent talking, laughing way too hard, and playing with their two little cuties. It wasn't a long trip but it was so much fun! We need to make it a tradition to go out there at least once a year. Thanks for the fun time Bell family!

Cute little Layla bug

Out to eat at Maggiano's. SOO good

 

Couldn't even make it through his cracker

 

At the Butterfly place

 

Zach hates spiders. He couldn't even look at it! Pansy...

 

Such a cute little family

 

At first she thought it was a friend so she ran in to the mirror. haha

 

She was obsessed with this turtle. She kept coming back, pointing to it, and then talking to it

 

Jackson took this picture, that's why it's so close. But I think it's cute!

 

Midnight after the Game on Diet was over. We splurged! 

 

At the St. Patrick's Day parade

 

This little girl was worn out!

 

15 years- One Great Friend

So I know I haven't blogged in awhile and boy do I have A LOT to blog about, but I just had to write about this before it gets to be too far away. I want to remember my feelings about it, even though they'll be hard to forget. Yesterday, May 15, 2012, I lost one of my best friends. Jasmine has been our dog since she was a puppy, 15 years, and she has been there for us through everything. She was such a mild tempered dog that was always so loving and friendly to everyone. She always knew when one of us was upset or down about something and would be there to comfort us and make us feel better. Even when I was sick and laying on the couch, or crying for some reason, she would come over sit down, and just rest her head on my lap until I fell asleep or calmed down.

There was one time I remember in detail. Jasmine had never gone upstairs in our old house because it was always off limits to her. It was where all the bedrooms were and she just slept downstairs. When I was going in to my junior year of high school I had an extensive knee surgery that put me out from soccer for a long time. They had done a lot of bone work and that night I was in a lot of pain. I was trying to crutch up the stairs to get to bed and my mom was walking right behind me to make sure that I didn't fall backwards. Right behind my mom, there was Jasmine. She followed us all the way up the stairs, in to my room, and stood at the foot of the bed while my mom got me situated. She propped my knee up on some pillows and made sure that I was comfortable. Of course I was crying because I was in so much pain, but right when I laid down, Jasmine hopped up on my bed and laid down right next to me. She had never done that before! She never jumped up on the furniture or had even come up the stairs for that matter. She stayed there all night. In the morning, she jumped down and followed me all the way back downstairs. She did this night after night during my recovery. I was going through this very difficult time in my life and she was right there for me.

She was always so excited when I would come home from BYU-Hawaii. She would weave in and out of my legs, and push her head in to my hand just begging for attention. As she got older and sicker she would still get up and greet me at the door even if she didn't have much energy. She would wag her tail and beg for attention and follow us around everywhere. She never licked us and she rarely barked. We would just put our heads together and that's how she showed us that she loved us. Some people may think I'm lame for blogging and being so upset about a dog and if so, I feel bad that they didn't have a relationship with a pet like I did. Jasmine was a member of our family. She was with us for 15 years; I grew up with her. She was a perfect example of how to love people unconditionally, even when we were pushing her away because we were complaining about how bad her breath smelled.

Some things I'm going to miss:

• Hearing her nails on the floor
• Almost tripping over her because she would stand so close
• Hearing her little noises when she's dreaming
• Listening to her collar jingle as she picks her head up to see who it is
• Just hearing her breathing when she's asleep on the floor
• Having her follow me around everywhere 
• Her comforting me through all my hard times
• And many more

I loved this dog and I always will. I know she's happy now that she's not sick and I'm sure my Grandma Waite is taking care of her and feeding her like crazy! I can't wait to see her again. I love you Jasmine.

 

Christmas Time

Ok so I finally had the time and patience to blog about Christmas decorating, Christmas partying, and Christmas. My internet would take forever to upload pictures and I didn't want another post with all words so I had to be patient. I have to go back awhile to remember everything so sorry about that.

On December 2nd, I had the whole day off so I took the opportunity to get our Christmas decorations put up before Zach's work Christmas party later that night. We've slowly accumulated some Christmas decorations so we don't have a lot yet or a lot of places to put them, but I still think it's really cute.

Let's face it, I didn't really know what I was doing here but I had some small ornaments and I thought they looked cute hanging from the ceiling. I'm obviously still learning.

Our stockings :)

My table centerpiece

Our tree! I couldn't get a very good picture but here it is

Then that night Zach and I went to his Ebay Christmas party. It was at an event center downtown because there were a ton of people there and it was really fun. There was a lot of food, yummy drinks (non-alcoholic for us of course), and dancing. Zach and I don't get dressed up and go out very often so it was really fun to go downtown and just party for a night. I bought a new shirt for Zach and I, and my awesome sister-in-law Kaley did my hair for me. I thought it turned out great and it was a lot of fun!



We all know that I'm really bad at taking pictures (that's why one of my resolutions is to take at least 1 picture a week this year) so I didn't get any pictures of Christmas this year. But Christmas was way good. We went down to Zach's parent's house on Christmas Eve after we both got off work and had a great dinner with their good friends the Kajiyama's. The Sunday before Christmas everyone was saying how bored they were so his dad whipped out a 700 piece puzzle for us all to work on. We got a lot done that night but everyone was getting sick of it, except me! I was so determined to get that thing done and when we got there on Christmas Eve it was exactly how we left it. So we spent some time relaxing with the family and I would work on the puzzle every once in awhile.

We all went to bed so that we could wake up at 6:30 to open presents before church started at 9 and Zach had to leave for work. It was great and so fun to see all of them open their presents and to open the presents that Zach had gotten for me. His parents also got us both a complete 72 hour kit set from Emergency Essentials which was awesome! (Another resolution of mine is to get a good food storage started). Christmas day was just a lazy day of lounging in pajamas, eating leftovers, me hanging out with his siblings, and then I took a nap. I woke up from my nap to Zach coming in because he got off work early. It was so slow that they sent almost everyone home so it was awesome that I got to spend most of Christmas with him. That night we had dinner and then got to call Zach's brother, Josh, who is on a mission in the Philippines. It was so good to talk to him but it definitely made me miss him more. Even though I don't have any pictures, Christmas was so fun and I finished the puzzle with Zach's mom! Jacob and Zach and Adam would help every once in awhile but we were the ones who put the most time in. I had never finished a puzzle before so I was so happy that I took a picture of it! (see below)